Raph @ 12 ]

Sunday Dinner with Sisters and Brother

The Real World (Experiential Report)

MPD PRESS CORPS




Manila Police District






TV5





Today as I step forward to another chapter in my life I can say that I’m the happiest person in the world to be able to learn and experience what I had as a media practitioner in Manila Police District. It was not a long journey, but it made me realize and see so many things that not most ordinary people can see and experience. Like most people say Experiences are the best teacher, every experience that we have there is something that we can always remember and learn with, something that can make us better or worst.

One month may not be that long but it was a great journey, I believe it’s not the span of time that counts the most but it is the memories and the experiences that you can always look forward with.

My stay in Manila Police District (Press Corps) being a writer trainee in Hataw showed me the real world. Of course being new to Police Beat made me so ignorant, I’m really clueless of what will happen on a day to day basis. I’m not that good in crime reporting before, because I really hate crimes, who would love to report crimes? People being killed? Nobody would like to be reporting those things because we would prefer good news than bad news. But reality bites, this is the world that we have, that crimes is a daily basis, it happens everywhere and anytime.

I was hesitant to be in this field, but knowing me I always love challenges, I love to explore new things and learn things that I don’t know. That’s how persistent I am; I always try and never quit battles.
So like every first timers I started with a scratch, my first day is like my first day in school, I was nervous. Seeing new faces, new environment and being new field pressured me. But things went so easy for me on my first day, because of my mentor who is the most kind mentor in the world, Leonard Basilio, he was expert in writing police stories. He helps me know the format and how I will be able to gather news in Manila Police District Office. So it wasn’t that hard for me to adapt the new environment in MPD.

I was able to published one article on my first day, though it wasn’t that perfect there were some parts of it that was edited but I’m still proud that I was able to make one, Good for a first timer .

The following days were stressful because I had to come from my graveyard shift at work to MPD. Sleepless, a lot oft things to do was pressuring me. But I knew I had to survive not just for myself but this things that I’m doing are for my future. And quitting is never an option; I don’t want to be a failure. Know matter how stressed I was, I continued my training, and thankfully Sir Basilio understands my time and wasn’t strict about it.

Luckily the next days I was able to publish more articles with God’s glory. Though writing those articles doesn’t really make me happy because those are incidents that involves people in crimes, and most of them are very rude. Writing the names of the people who are killed and who had traumatic experiences made me sad and realize that there are people in this world who can’t do anything good among themselves that they can kill humans just to get what they want and for simple reasons that I myself can say that Communication can solve. That’s the hardest part that I have to face when I’m writing, interviewing victims and suspects made me thing too much.

But that’s how life is, not all of us want to good things, that crimes are everywhere in our society that in one glimpse we might be on the news for certain reasons that we don’t pray to happen at all.

My stay in MPD opens my mind that everyday that we are alive is something that we should always be thankful to our creator, that everyday is such a blessing know matter how we are messed up with the kind of life that we have, still everyday is a blessing.
I developed my skills in writing police stories, I get used to how I would gather information’s and news for my article, that it takes effort to have a good story. I also learn to deal and communicate with people who are professionals and high profile, such as police directors, chief officers, TV anchors and photojournalists.

My one month stay in MPD gave me the opportunity to meet and greet the people in media, not just in television but mostly in print. Writers from famous publications such as Manila Bulletin, Philippine Star, Abante Tonite, Photographers, cameraman’s and of course news anchors in TV and radio. Being with them in one room is really a star struck experience, I’m amazed how they write and report there news, I look up to them and they inspire me a lot. They gave me some advices that are really very inspiring in my part, they would always tell me that they started with nothing, so I should trust myself and believe that I can be what they are right now or even more than what they have.

Policemen and officers, janitor and cook in the office became my friends; I would talk to them and exchange jokes to make them smile after working too much. I love having conversation with this people because you will learn a lot from them.
This are simple things that mark to my stay, I was lucky that I met the requirements for 15 articles, it was a blessing that I applied in HATAW, having a great mentor who is very helpful and kind made my stay worthwhile. The days I bond with him and the busy cramming days where things I would always miss. It was an unforgettable experience, and I’m looking forward to work with this people someday.

Now I can say, nothing is impossible as long as you trust yourself, all the lessons from MPD will always be a guide on my journey for my dreams that I hope to come true. (Sherry Rose Cayabyab)

Team Rhona

After training, Team Rhona is the first team that I work with since last March 2011 when I was hired in SITEL. After a month, I was able to adjust with the people in this team, and they are really friendly and happy people, especially our coach, who is very much bubbly and funny.

Unlike other team you can't feel the pressure with work because my coach make sure that we are enjoying while we are working, she's not strict unlike other coaches, yes she would talk to us when we are doing something that is not good but she will make you feel after the talk that its fine to make mistakes just don't do the same mistake next time.

Its a month since we were transferred to different teams, I guess I really miss them alot especially the boys whom I always exchange jokes with. I hope to bond with them soon :)


Team Rhona

Coach: Ronalyn Cercado
Mentor: Chris Tayag
Team Members

Arjay
Enzo
Tin
Sab
Bennie
Eve
Jam
Jin
Jaydee
Yen
Janice
Mary Jane

Overloaded ;-(

Thesis, Ojt, exams, magazine article, a lot of things to do for school, I guess I can consider this semester to be the hardest semester not because I'm working at the same time, but for me it is really that hard :-(

You can feel the pressure when your inside the classroom, everyone is busy with stuffs to do, and I don't know how I was able to manage everything despite of being sick most of the time.


It helps really to have self discipline and determination, the passion to do the things you know you can't but you still have the guts to do it. I remember one time, I was really telling myself, Gagraduate pa kayo ako?, I thought of that really, because I feel like giving up because of stress and lack of rest.


But today, as I put myself to another busy week, I should focus and limit the things I spend a lot of time doing the most in a day, time management will be the solution for all of this.


Well, heads up for Chapter 4 and 5 thesis making, and looking forward to thesis defense (am i really looking forward for that?).


Wish me luck everyone and pray for me ^_^



A message from our class president sa wall ng group namin, super stress na talaga lahat



At eto naman ang pampalubag loob na mensahe ko ^_^



Si rochelle na galit na sa mga classmates namin na hindi nag submit ng articles nila




The evidence that I was able to submit my article on time :)

When B meets her

09/21/2011 It was actually one of my happiest day, I was with the person I love even if it was for a stolen 3 hours. Nothing can compare to the feeling of being wrapped on the arms of the man you love the most. The stare on his eyes made me realize that I don't want to lose him.

My Superman ^_^

"Didang" and "Didong" that's the famous nickname that my Papa and I share for so many years. When people would see me and dad together, they would always say "Xerox Copy". Gestures, how we speak, eat, walk, and talk are exactly the same. Even the simplest thing like our behavior in watching television is undeniably incomparable. And the same reason why I'm a daddy's girl.


For the 19 years of life, I never tell PAPA how proud I am being her daughter. He's the best father that I can never ask for, he might not be the perfect father but I knew he tried his best to give us the best of what he can give.


I wouldn't be what I am today without his guidance and support, though at times he might not agree to all the things that I want to do in life , i know he is my no. 1 fan and cheerleader in all the things that I do.


I have so many memories of my PAPA, especially when I was a child. He was very focussed in teaching me, at age of 3; I mastered alphabets, counting, addition and subtraction because of his patience in teaching me as well as my elder sister.
He was the person who values education a lot. He would always remind me that I should study hard each time. I'm proud to say that I'm intelligent because my dad was the best teacher.And I can't forget the smile on his face each time he would stepped on stage to put our medals and awards. He was very happy and so proud of us that we were all doing great in school, that his hardship is not wasted at all. He put as on private and very good schools in Manila, that he did not mind how much he has to work hard for it as long as we have the best.


My dad, is not only our teacher, our provider, but he is also very helpful and a public servant. He is the president of the Parents Teacher Association in my brother's school at Antonio Maceda Integrated School, which he has implemented so many projects that helps the school a lot. He is also the Sports Chairman of New Manila Association each quarter he would provide a basketball league to give enjoyment and fun to his fellow.

Now that I'm turning twenty in 3 months time, I can still consider myself a daddy's little girl. On my last 18th birthday year 2009,I felt all the love from my dad, he prepared a big party for me, he spent a lot of money just to give me that memorable debut party.I cried so much when my dad made his speech for me, because I never thought he appreciates every little thing that I do for him. The simplest thing like cooking for him, taking care of him when his sick and constantly being there for him each time he needed me the most. The line that made me cry a lot is when dad told everybody on my party this exact line, "Napakaswerte ko sa anak ko na yan kasi hindi ako iniiwan niya, yan lang ang nakakatiyaga sa ugali ko, kahit onting sakit lang ng ulo at tiyan ko gusto na akong dalihin sa ospital, at sobrang kawawa ako kapag nagasawa na yan, kaya sana matagal pa, alam ko magiging mabuti syang anak at asawa balang araw kasi napakabait ng batang yan". Tears of joy starts to fell from my eyes, because I knew on the days that I'm with my dad , I knew I have given the best love and care a daughter should always give to there dad's.

I always felt my dad's love for me, even in simple ways; he would bring me to work when he knows that I'm so tired, he would always ask me how's school? how's work? We have little conversations, that I can tell him what I want to tell him, the people I hate on school, everything about my work, those stuffs.

To my dearest Papa, I love you so much, that I may not tell you everyday, but God knows I could give up everything for you and our family, that I will do everything just to pursue all the dreams that you have for me. Papa, few months to go I know you'll be proud of me, because I know that your dream for me is to finish college, and I'm almost there. I just want you to know that I will never get tired of loving and taking care of you, even you have the craziest mood most of the time I will always try to understand you. Thank you for everything that you did for me and my siblings, for providing me almost everything that I want. You've given me so much that I can't ask for more.

I promise not to leave you and take care of you when your hair turns gray and when there is nothing left to you; i'll be there on your entire journey.



Happy father's day PAPA, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH ^_^

Forgive. Forget and Move On

This days wasn't easy for me, It was one of the hardest days that i have to go through. Trusting has always been a big issue with me, because of trusting too much I end up being betrayed and hurt. I can easily trust a person not knowing and measuring them first.

Right now, I can think of any thing that I did, in any ways, I can't remember that I hurt them, not even a single reason I would never ever hurt them, because I love them being the closest friend to me. I value friendship more than anything else, that's why I've been surrounded with so may friends around me, because I know I can keep them well. But now, I don't know what happen? What did I did to make them betrayed me?

They talk shit on me, tell stories behind my back which are never true at all. I cannot believe that in all people in the world it would be them to do that. Because of all people they should be the one who knows me well. But judgments coming from them is

Call Girl

"Challenging" that's the nature of work that you can experience when you start working in a call center. The challenge of being an excellent customer representative. Call Center is not a new industry for me since my eldest sister start working at the age of 17, in this field. I had an idea of how its going to be. The graveyard shift and the sleepless nights.

Late march, i entered this industry not knowing if i would love the job or if I'm ready to take the challenge and explore the potentials that I have.I was with my closest friend Angeline, we had a free day and we been wanting to work again, like last summer that we worked in Department of Education. We always want to try new things together, so we end up one day in Ortigas to apply a job.


Initial interview, Exams, Phone Stimulation, Behavioral Interview, and Operations Manager was the hard processes that you have to go to in order to be hired. Of course English Policy applies and you have to make the people in H.R impressed. I remember my gay interviewer, laughing at me when he asked me "How do you see yourself five years from now?" , and I answered, "I see myself five years from now,I'm the Operations Manager of this company because I believe there is no impossibility in the world, If only you have the courage to succeed and the faith to believe there is nothing in life that would be hard to achieve" and he said " OMG! You are the Ms Universe 2011, Bravo! " So with my Beauty Queen Line, Unexpectedly, both of us were hired and thankful that it was meant to be for us.

I started with no directions, I would always remember My first mentor Eric Pamintuan telling me "Sherry, believe me, you will do good here in SITEL" a simple word that would encourage me to try and pursue this career.So I never doubted my self, and continue the training. Everyday was a new learning experience for me.

On the middle of my training in SITEL, I feel like quitting because of the account I was assigned "Cricket"; a wireless telecommunication company in United States. To be honest, its really a toxic account. Especially you are taking so many calls each shift which has the minimum of 50 calls. There will be times that I will think of applying to another company because I'm having a hard time on my first two weeks in OCP (On Call Production).

There are a lot of things to take note, remember and ,master especially you cannot messed up with every customers account because Americans value there time so much, every seconds and dollars counts for them. Billing was the hardest for me, especially with the new system that we have which is not accurate most of the time. The first three weeks would always be a supervisor call, fast computation was one of the things you have to deal with.

But I gave my self a heads up, and think hard, I have invested so much for this; time and learning. Should I waste everything that I have invested? Just because I think I can't do it? And finally, God has never teach me the wrong way to go, in the end I still thought of what is the best thing to do. And that is to believe and have faith in myself that if others can, why can't I? If others are good, why I shouldn't be? I will always put in my mind that Quitters are losers! And I don't want to be a loser. And its never in my nature to quit battles. Cause I survived the biggest trial in my life the past years so not this opportunity would make me quit.

Eventually when I started taking calls in the Floor and be distributed in my perspective team, I started enjoying the field of work because of the people that I worked with, they are very enjoyable to be with and happy people, my Coach is very supportive as well. So I don't feel so much pressure when I'm on the floor and taking calls.


There will be days that I'm losing patience with my customers because of being so demanding, irate and unreasonable but that is the challenge of this job to give customer the right and appropriate solutions on their problems, provide satisfaction and of course to leave big smiles on there faces right after the call.


Today, I can really say that being a customer representative has made me explore and use my communications skills very well. I can express myself more and be able to talk to different kinds of people. At 19 not everybody has given the opportunity to be on this career. I'm lucky that I was given the chance.


I'm looking forward to more days of headache, sleepless nights, but enjoyable and fun working experience ^_^




Workmates :)


My first MENTOR and TRAINER








Wave Giginox












Wave 23A

waiting :"c

You know those night when you stay awake waiting for the one person to text you or call back? Your heart starts being a little faster and you get so impatient. You stare at your phone constantly pressing random buttons so the lights stay on. When they finally do text you, they give you that one worded reply. No matter how boring they are to text, you always find something to talk about. Then all of a sudden you lie your head on your pillow and fall asleep. When you wake up, the only thing you see is just another one worded text. As much as you try with them, they will never return the love you give to them. You keep trying and trying, and all of a sudden you find yourself not even bothering any more. No matter how much you may try, not everyone will return the feelings you give them.

B, to tell you the truth, I never wanted to take a distant with you, I would always want to be your girlfriend, I don't care how complicated your life is, how many times I have to be hurt.Life is never the same without you greeting me in the morning, and telling me how much you love me.With you telling me how much you love me would make me forget all the pain. I know its imposible for you to come back, but if ever you would want to I would always accept you. I’m here. I love you. I don’t care if i need to stay up crying all night long, I will stay with you. There’s nothing you can ever do to lose my love. I miss you a lot :'c

Helpless

I woke up in the morning with puffy and swollen eyes, again I slept crying on our sofa with my besfriend trying to pull my hair and make me stopped. I never thought it would be this hard, I have so many questions in my mind that I can't find the perfect answers for it because he left me with no further explanations just telling me "ayoko na rin". I don't get where he is coming from, its like in just 4 days he changed, I kept on asking myself what have I done? Am I not good for him?

Each time i find answers i would end up hurting because I would always remember his promises that we would work this out and stay loving each other for the longest time. Had so many plans already but I don't think anything will ever happen again.

I could not really hate him even I wanted to so I can have reasons for moving on, but I can't, my heart can't. How can I hate someone I loved.

There's a later part in my head telling me bakit kasi hinayaan mo pa siyang bumalik ulit sa buhay mo? nawala na siya db? and my head will find its answers I did trust him because he promised me that he would stay know matter how I often get hurt, but he did not.


I'm overthinking, clueless and wasted because he don't know what I'm going through this days, he's one of my greatest strength but now that i'm in so much battles, he's not there. He left me standing alone and left things unsaid.


He would wlays tell me that he doesn't deserve me because he always make me cry and hurt me but that's part of loving and know matter how many times he hurt me, everything will heal as long as I have him.


And as of this moment I'm not sure of the best thing to do, when I'm trying to set my mind in moving on, I can't start at all b't know because the feelings is have is strong that it cannot find a space for moving on, if staying would be the best thing to do I should be ready everything that will happen, I will risk .And I don't know exactly to go for.

What's i'm sure about, I'm still waiting, waiting for him to ask me back on his life, I know its impossible, but if it would give me the strength to hold on i want all those impossibilities.

Fighting it :'c

You know that feeling? When you’re just waiting. Waiting to get home, into your room, close the door, fall into bed, and just let everything out that you kept in all day. That feeling of both relief and desperation. Nothing is wrong. But nothing is right either. And you’re tired. Tired of everything, tired of nothing. And you just want someone to be there and tell you it’s okay. But no one’s going to be there. And you know you have to be strong for yourself, because no one can fix you. But you’re tired of waiting. Tired of having to be the one to fix yourself and everyone else. Tired of being strong. And for once, you just want it to be easy. To be simple. To be helped. To be saved. But you know you won’t be. But you’re still hoping. And you’re still wishing. And you’re still staying strong and fighting, with tears in your eyes. You’re fighting

I Love Him♥

♥ He's not the best looking, he's not the smartest in the world, he can be a jerk sometimes, but for some reason, I don't care , I love him.♥

♥Happy 1st ♥

Relationships do not get easier. Every day is a struggle, Every day is a battle. It doesn't get easier with time. In fact, it gets harder. The secret is finding someone who's willing to be weak and strong with you at the same time. The secret is finding someone who's willing to work with you and who will push you, challenge you, make it harder for you to leave. The beauty is in the struggled I'm lucky to find a man who never quit on me, the man who makes me the happiest.

Today is our 1st month, where still on the short run but it never felt that we just met,because everyday is like we've known and love each other for the longest time.

We've started as total strangers, and it was just through text that we met 4 years ago, and since then we became friends and started to share a lot of things with each others.

Our closeness started to grow in to a deeper relationship that in a while, he started admitting his feeling with me, but since I was very immature during those days, I never take love seriously, I flirt a lot, see other guys. I declined and reject the love he offered to me. I knew by that time I was feeling something already but I was always have doubts about our distance, because ever since then, Long Distance Relationship is a no! No! For me. I know i make “paasa”, but It wasn't my intention.


I caused him pain, and it was just later on that I realized how much he means to me, but he was in love with another girl. And not in my life I thought of feeling an extreme pain , he was into someone and it made me felt really regretful. His attention is no longer with me, “HER” is no longer the apple of his eyes. It makes me sad, that i took distant for 3 months, no text messages at all, that I even deleted him on my Facebook friend list.That's when the time I realized that you would only know the value of a person in your life when he stops showing that he loves you . It was the time that I realized that I can't lose him.



But God has always his ways of putting things on the right perspective, so in March we finally communicate again, and renew the friendship we had, but this time there's no bitterness and pain. Everything was back to usual, common talk, sharing of stories and happy conversations. Then it was all the start of a good relationship, I enjoyed each day because of him, and I felt it was the time to give this feelings chance to grow. And came the 30th we officially commit.


And today, i felt incomplete because I cannot celebrate this day with him, it would have been better if he's here sitting beside me while we hold hands together and make the best out of this day, but unfortunately it cannot happen, and that's the thing that makes me a little sad, but I always put in my mind that he's just there even he's not physically around me, I know I own his heart, same way that he owns my heart.



B, i know its not gonna be easy, its gonna be really hard, and we gonna have to work at this everyday, But I wanna do that because I want you, I want all of you, forever, you and me everyday.


B, I can’t wait for that day when I’m going to wake up next to you.I don't want the expiration date, i want this for a long time

Where we will both open our eyes and both start looking at each other, face to face, smiling, and thinking to our self how much we love this moment. Wouldn’t it be nice to start off the day next to you? Sometimes, the smallest things mean the most. I'll whisper “I love you” and kiss you then say my sweetest good morning. I don’t know about you, but that’s something I’d appreciate doing and getting. I can’t wait for that day


I hope its not just 1st, 2nd, 3rd, 4th but many many years :)
2 seconds ago · Like

B

If you're going to love me, love me deeply. If you’re going to break my heart, then break it all. If you’re going to care, care for me completely. If you decide not to hold me, then just let me fall. If you’re going to stay, then stay forever and if you want to leave, then do it today. If you’re going to change, change for the better. And if you’re going to talk, please mean what you say.

I've never been jealous, I can't be jealous, and I don't want to be jealous!

Yes, I'm jealous, and it feels so bad. I'm not insecure about her, maybe I just don't like the idea that those pictures are being tag on my B's profile. It pissed me off, I don't know why but its something that irritates me. I know they are good friends, and I have nothing against that, but I can't help myself from being jealous because I know for a fact they are together most of the time, which I can't do. B posting comments on her wall is what I hate the most. I would always remember the time B gaved her too much attention. I know its not healthy for any relationship to have this kind of issue, that causes arguments most of the time.
B, just please don't give me any reasons to get jealous :(

*March 30, 2011*

Making a risk in the name of love, I never really like the idea of entering any long distance relationship.But now, it changes, this man changed my view of love. Stepping to a serious stage of relationship will not be easy, especially on our situation where we are 13 hours away from each other. But the feeling of knowing he's there not physically but emotionally is something that makes me choose to stick with this kind of set up. Yes, there will be times that I wanted to be there, taking care of him especially when he's sick, but I can't do anything about it. I need to be here to study and live my life. I know there will be challenges that our relationship will go through, but I know we can always survive everything because we had come so far, that even where far, a deep friendship was build between us through the years.
I'm looking forward on the days that will be together, spent our days doing the things we love to do. I wanted to be there on his side and tell him how much I love him, that I wanted to see myself being with him for so many years. Yes! Many years because I can't see myself being with someone else more than him.
I've waited for this for so long, and now its here I'll keep it and make sure that It will never be destroyed.

B, I LOVE YOU, and I can't wait to spend time with you. Let's take care of this, and love each other always =) I'M YOURS, your mine =)

THE WRITER OF THIS PAGE IS CURRENTLY IN THE STAGE OF FINDING HERSELF SO PLEASE BARE WITH IT♥

Because of our busy schedule; I, Angeline and Angiely doesn't have chances to bond anymore, it was this day that we had our time to relax and talk about the things we missed out with each others. It feels good and fun each time I'm with them, i feel no worries at all, and I just can be myself with them.

cuteee :)

ang bigat nito promise!

floating angiely , ang bigat!

We ate meryenda at Angie's place and swim. It was only the three of us who where there to swim, so it was really fun and we can make all the things we want to in the pool. Since, Angiely is a very good swimmer she made us see her swimming tricks. Angeline did the frog swim which is really funny because she can do it very well. We did a lot of talks, the usual talks that involves our secrets and private life which remains just to the three of us, I missed those conversations because I knew It was only the two of them that I can tell everything that I won't be judged at all, the same way with them to me. I love how we start conversations and exchange words, you wouldn't think that we are very good friends , because when we talk we sound so angry with each others, it is how we show our love for each others.

USAPAN NG MGA MONGOLOID

From me:

" Yung phone ko malubog yan sa tubig! Tae kau ingatan nio yan! yan lang ang phone na tumagal sakin, isang taon na yan" hehe

Sherry to Angiely: " Cge paunahan tayo mula dito hnggng dun sa dulo"

Sherry to Angiely: "ay wait bka may hagdan jan mauntog ako!"
Angiely to sherry: tanga! hnd mu ba mkikita yan sa ilalim? bobo ka nlng kung mauntog ka!
(sapul c sherry hahaha)

Sherry: yes! nauna ko, ang galing ko talaga!

Angeline: ulol, wla ka pa sa kalahati nakaahon ka na

Angiely: Paunahan pla ah, lakas ng loob

From Angeline:
"Ayoko na magpicture! lahat nlng ng kuha ko pangit!(mainis ba smen?)
(mainis ba smen?)

(angeline nag pic ulit)

angiely to angeline: "wow gnda parang baboy lng ilong mu dito bhe"

angeline to angiely: " leche ka, pauwiin ko kayo sakin tong pool cge umayos ka!"

sorry feel na feel ko:)

pinakamabigat :)

Ang tatlong mutya haha:)

This are the moments I can't trade for anything, I love every second I spent with them, and I can't imagine life without this two beautiful woman :) I'm looking forward to more bonding moments with them, i love you both!♥

Wanna have stuffs

This is my dream Laptop,MACBOOK; i've been wanting to have this, I prefer the pink one because its more of a girl thing, this cost about 80,000 which is really expensive. I don't know when i can have this, but I'm dying to get one.

I'm a music lover, and I always wanted to have this apple itouch 4th gen, i hope to have this before summer ends, need to save a lot :)

Angie turns 19

Memories that i will trasure forever, (this was taken during our softball class, three years ago)

We have shared a lot of trials and hardships together, i love this girl a lot :) She was one of the biggest gift that I received when I entered in College. She is undeniably a good person inside and out, a woman who works hard to give the best for her family.

In your 19th Angie, i just want you to know, that i'll always be here for you, know matter what happens. May God continue to bless you and gave you the desires of your heart.

i love you bhe bhe , thank you for being a real friend :)

i can wait for more years of laughters and happiness with you :)

The birthday girl

this is how sweet we are, holding hands while walking

My bitter Childhood

It’s not easy for me to go back to the memories of my childhood, it took me enough courage to finally talk about it and express how I felt and what it brought me. But today as I learn to appreciate life and its blessings i wanted to share to everyone what my childhood experience taught me.

Eight years ago, I was lost and depressed, i felt so miserable that I’ve thought of ending my life because of pain, the pain of losing your family and everything that you have. I was always been loving towards my family, at a young age being the second child and someone more responsible than our eldest I was always given the responsibility at home especially in taking care of my younger siblings, that made me emotionally attached to them that I never thought in my life that I could lose them in a glimpse.

My parents used to love each other’s so much, like any other husband and wife they would have simple fights but that won’t last for so long, I witnessed how they fought for their love even their families have their own contradiction. I saw how a good wife my mom was and the same thing as my dad being a good provider. We were such a happy family living in a happy home with a simple life. My dad was very hard working; he accepts different kind of jobs to put us in a good school. Since then, blessings starts to flow, we transferred in a new home, had a business, we were studying in private schools, and we have money, we can buy the things we wanted without working so hard for it.

That was the start of all the mess in our life, with all the goodness of life, the blessings we have, my parents have forgotten the true worth of money, they were both very busy on fixing our small business that they would have arguments that cannot be easily settled, and most of the time they would end up hurting from each other physically and emotionally after each fight. That made me really sad and worried a lot. I’ve saw the big changes on them; it seems that I don’t know them anymore, money has changed them a lot.

Then One day, we found out something that started to ruin our family, my dad is having an affair to another girl. I would hear my parents fight about it, they would shout hurtful words to each other which will end up to another physical and emotional abused. Each day of going to school was a burden for me, because I’m absorbing all the pain at home, it was not a normal thing for me.

I and my siblings are suffering a lot. As days and months passed the fight among my parents continues that even their families will include themselves which makes the situation worst, that makes it hard to fixed, I was losing hope. My heart would melt each time I see my mom crying and the painful process she is going through because of dad cheating on her, being a child; clueless and innocent, I don’t have idea who is right and wrong with what is happening to them, I will be honest that I hated my dad, that I was blaming him, because at that time I knew from my teachers that cheating was a sin so without knowing the reason why my dad cheated on my mom, I took side on my mom. There was this one time that Mom and dad was on a argument that I answered back my dad and shouted on him, it was also the first time that he slapped me on my face, that made me hate him more each day.

Months passed again, and nothing is changed, fight still continues, my dad’s affair with another girl continues that they would publicized they affair, that makes me so depressed and hopeless. At home, we were no longer a family like we used to be before, love is gone which supposed to start with the parents. You can feel and see that there is no longer love that bond them together it was all just for the sake of us their children.

Our small business which they put up together, started to fall, we were down with all of our credits just to save the business, unfortunately it wasn’t save. We closed the business and started to leave nothing. Not until my Elementary Graduation has gone, the day that I’m most afraid to happen took place, it was the saddest day of my life , the day that my parents says goodbye and go separate ways, I’ve thought of this day but never imagined that it will happen. It was the worst thing that a young child like me can ever experience. Whatever I said did not help to save our family; we left our home in New Manila with nothing. Leaving the life that you were used to was hard, especially the people who have also contributed in your life, the people you trusted, no matter how sad it was, we have to say goodbye also to our Yaya Jessica and Badong who took care of us. Since my parents will go separate ways we have to choose where to go, we did not choose anyone from them, instead we agreed that we can go and visit each one of them and stay where we like. So we had our freedom, there are times that I’m with dad and there are times that I’m on mom’s place.

Waking up in the morning knowing you no longer have a complete family to be with was painful, I would wake up crying and end my day crying again and again, the normal routine that I have to go through just to ease the loneliness and pain. I know it was not normal for such a growing teenager to be depressed but it was a trauma that I was able to bring each day of my life. I have to get used to the changes in my life, the well of life which we had was one of the biggest adjustment process, I can no longer go to the private school I would want, I can no longer buy the things I wanted. But I’m not really after the material things; I’m after my family’s welfare. I cannot take how my sibling’s life would be after all of this, what future ahead of them. It was a nightmare for me; it was all a nightmare that I don’t want to remember all over again.

I’m talking here being a daughter, a sister and a woman, I’m sharing these because I want everybody to know how I was able to survived with it, well, I won’t deny that It was not easy, there was a time in my life that I would hold a knife and cut my wrist, i would only have little scratches on my wrist, I cannot do it, because I cannot take in my heart to kill myself and do nothing for my family. I needed to be strong and that’s what I did, and I can’t believe that I was able to survived; me and my family. I know it’s not only me who experienced this kind of problem, I know there are worst cases out there, and believe me or not, I still feel lucky, why? Because I was in a good direction as I talk today. And with all the pain, hardship and problems that I had face along my way I never give up, instead I used it as an inspiration to be a better person and build a good future.

I can’t believe that 8 years has already passed, I’m no longer the little girl that used to cry a lot, I’m now a lady, independent and stronger, that was the goodness that my bitter past has given me. Being a daughter, I was able to fulfill my duty of taking care of my parents, I have found forgiveness for my dad, and I love him more reach day because I know he regret everything that happen even if it’s too late it was a lesson learned for him. It took me years to forgive and forget but the wait was all worth it. Acceptance was part of the process, but when you see that your family is there for you it becomes lighter. Though you are not on one roof as afamily when you feel that love among each other’s there will be no challenges that you cannot survived.

Right now, I can say that I’m happy this way, I have accepted that my parents cannot be together again, and that its God’s will that this happened for a purpose. The only thing that makes us survived this trials is FAITH, Whatever problems each person are experiencing just keep the faith, because faith will bring us to where we should be. He knows best more than anyone else.

I know there a lot of teenagers around us who are experiencing this kind of problems, going through a broken family is difficult especially when you are growing up, but what really matters the most is do the good thing, try not to rebel and make it as an inspiration that you should do better in everything that you do especially in reaching your dreams, doing this things will help your family and yourself as well.

My bitter past has taught me a lot and molded me as a person I am today. Lessons have learn, I just have to continue being the best daughter and sister that I can be. Now, I’m much stronger and I know I can face any problems that will come my way; my Faith will help me go the right way.

I've Learned

I've learned this past year. I've changed, I've grown. Maybe things do happen for a reason, maybe they don't. But no matter what - they still happen. That's what we need to remember. I learned to stop analysing things, to just let them happen. And if I get hurt, or if something bad happens, then it happens. There's something I can do to change that. I've learned to go with my gut, and that it's okay to make mistakes. I've learned that love really is a great as they say it is. I've learned that your friends can't save you from your worst enemy: yourself. And most importantly, I've learned that today is all we have.

My ultimate crush ^-^

My boyfriend to be

(echos lng)

Simo Atkins

De Lasalle

My 7 year Plans

At 19, I have a lot of plans in my mind, but one thing is for sure, I want to be successful. I want my parents to be proud of me, its priceless to see your parents happy knowing that you achieve your goals in life.

My First plan in life is to graduate college, ofcourse diploma is the best gift I could give Papa and Mama, eversince they have been supported of me, even if they don't like Masscommunication for me,but I always tell them, its not the course that matters in succeeding, its how you use what you learn. I cannot wait to have my diploma a year from now, that will be the best gift I can have because I know I put too much effort in getting it.

My second plan is to work, yes ofcourse I'm now working, but I want a job that I could really call a career, something that I will grow. I want to work in a big company where I can share my knowledge and grow professionally.

My third plan is to study again, after I graduate, I want to take up masteral, to widen my knowledge , so I can teach in the university where I graduated for free. Honestly, i will do that for free.

My fourth plan is to work abroad, yes!I always wanted to go to Canada, where my aunts and cousins lived, I've always admire Canada, the peaceful place and the working environment that they have. Since I was young I always have pictures of Vancouver, and I will always tell myself that I want to go there. The reason why I want to work there for three or four years is because I want to explore and be independent. But I know that it will be hard because I'm emotionally attached with my family.That I cannot imagine life without them.

My Fifth Plan is to give my family the best that I can give , house and lot for my parents and a business, I want to give them back everything that they gave me, I want them to enjoy and spend there lives that I was able to make them happy. They are the only reasons that inspire me to do good in everything that I do. So all the fruits of my hardwork will be for them.

My Sixth Plan is to travel the world, especially in Europe,I wanted to see Paris, it's beautiful.I want to learn cultures and languages as well.

In love, I don't really know what is planned for me, I wanted to plan it but I guess, I should just go with the flow, what God has planned for me. But ofcourse at age of 27, like every girl dreamed of, I want to walk down the aisle and marry the man I love, and marriage is forever. Forever which means that we will live in each others arm. I don't want history to repeat itself, so when I get married I'll make sure that its a lifetime commitment, where I'm going to be the best wife and mother of my kids.

7 years from now? let's see :-)

THE FIRST GUY TO SCREW ME

It took me not so long, but now I know the difference of actual love and infatuation, and it's clear to me that I love this guy. Eventhough he don't feel the same way like he used to feel before, Now I know the feeling of not being valued, the feeling of wanting someone you can't have. It's something that I never thought could happen to me. I had been a strong woman when it comes to love, but now, i don't know why i'm so weak?

Seeing there pictures is something that breaks my heart, but I guess that'sife, you cannot have everything you want. I don't know why i'm so complicated, there are guys here in Manila who's courting me, but I end up wanting this guy who's far from me, who loves someone else, see? I choose complicated situations.

The girl seems to be a nice girl, I feel so jealous about her, but I was never intimidated with what she is, because I know, I have something that she doesn't have, and I can do so many things that she can't.

I asked him if he loves her, and he said he does, there's a little pain on me, but I'm happy in other way around, because at some point in time I hurted him, he deserves to be happy. I guess, that's how love should be.

I believe that this happen because God has a better plan for me, maybe he wants me to learn the real meaning of love and how it should be taken cared of, maybe he wants me to find someone better for me in time, whatever his plans, I know he only wants the best for me.

And at the end of the day, we will all come to the discovery that our hearts are very precious. And at one point in time, we have to make it stop searching hold it still and remember that love does not want to be found. It finds us.

ONE OF MY BESTEST:)))

Me and Janeth

She's adorable and one of the nicest friend that I have. Janeth and I have been friends for 4 years now, and I can say that she is one of the bestest friends that I have. We never fought and never argue, we undeniably understands are strengths and weaknesses. And I can say that life has been so good since I was blessed with such girl friend like her, whom I share everything about me, even the little things about me. We survived every heartbreaks and problems that we encounter together, we always have our helping hand when ever one of us is down. I know I can always count on her.

She's like a siter to me, I share my stories, my laughs, and even my tears. It's funny that I'm just a house apart from her we always text each others and update a lot. I always enjoy are eating habits; eating our favorites like balut which we would crave in the middle of the night, our midnight conversations where we hang-out at home and stay until 2am or much, where we do nothing but talk and hear PAPA JACK'S TRUE LOV CONVERSATION ADN WILD CONFESSIONS.

That's the little things that makes me the happiest with her, i hope the friendship will continue to grow and last for a lifetime :)))